I am writing this post today with a very heavy heart but one that is hopeful at the same time. How do I even begin? How do I even begin to speak on a topic that I still feel uneducated about? This past week was hard on America. We have seen injustice, protests, riots, destruction, sadness, and all the in-between. In the midst of the chaos, we have also seen unity, action, education, and the mending of what I hope to call a transformed America. Mothers; we are being called. We are being called to raise our children in full awareness and educate them to know that we must love all people and fight for our brothers and sisters. In writing this post, I know I will not have all the right words. Moving forward in my content and posts I ask for your patience and grace as I continue to educate myself on these topics.
“Above all, Love each other deeply, because Love covers a multitude of Sins”
1 Peter 4:8
As I look back in my own life, I would like to think that I have always been an inclusive person. Loving people came naturally to me and I have my amazing parents to thank for that. My Mother is from the country of Chile. She immigrated to the United States and I am more than proud to call her my Mama. My Father is white and one of the most humble and loving men you will ever meet. He is a Deputy Sheriff in our local county & I have always been so proud of him. He does so much for our community! Being mixed in both races is something I have always taken pride in. I was able to learn my Mother’s culture and how loving, passionate, and fun the Chilean people are. I had the privilege of being able to travel there a few times and experience how my Mama grew up. Although I have many hispanic features, I understand that I can still “pass” as white. To be completely honest with you, I don’t even identify myself as white. On most forms and legal documents, I feel that my race never applied to the limited boxes provided. For white, it usually says “white NON hispanic/latino” which is NOT me. I am both. Since a box that states “white and hispanic” is not an option (that I have seen), I always mark Hispanic or Other depending on form options.
All the schools that I attended growing up were rich in culture. I have been around black kids, asian kids, hispanic kids, and many other races. I never personally felt that any person around me was “less than me or more than me” just because of their race of culture, I have always viewed my peers as equals. It was apparent to me that people had different values and opinions than me due to their personal experiences, but never did I think their race was something to diminish.
Although being surrounded by blacks and many other races my whole life, I am deeply saddened that I never knew the struggles that black people face. I never realized how oppressed they felt, how small they felt, and how discrimination was still very real in their lives. Watching the murder of George Floyd was hard. It was heavy. To be honest, I could only watch clips because it was so raw and real. How could someone do that? Why 8 minutes and 43 seconds? Being the daughter of a law enforcement officer this hit me hard. Although the actions of that officer were HORRIBLE, how do I advocate for the men and women in blue that they are not all like this. I have truly had the most heavy heart thinking of all of this. I am not always the best with words when it comes to hard topics like this. I found a post written by someone on Facebook and it resonated with me;
“I went back and forth on whether I wanted to post this or not for quite awhile. However, I think it’s important to speak on… so here goes. I’m a cop’s daughter, and I’ve seen my father’s work firsthand. I’ve gone on countless ride alongs, been to award ceremonies for him, and hell, I’ve even watched him help people that even I wouldn’t help. He does his part. Do I go to sleep scared that this may be the night we get the phone call that he’s not coming home? Yes. Often. Do I fear for his life? Every. Single. Day.
But here’s the thing- he chooses every day to do this job. He wakes up and puts his vest & badge on. In tense situations like the current state of America, he is armed with weapons, a vest, a helmet, and hell even riot gear if needed. And guess what? He gets to come home every night and take it all off. He can walk outside in his neighborhood, and nobody has to know he’s a cop. When the hate becomes to much- they can turn their badge in. They can walk away. That being a choice for them is a PRIVILEGE.
Now, all you Blue-backers- imagine that feeling of fear you feel for you cop brother/sister/father/mother/son/husband/child going to work, but amplified by x10000.
Black mothers/fathers/husbands/wives/children have to live in that same fear (x10000) every single minute of their lives. Can they change the color of their skin? No. They don’t get to come home and change their skin tone when being hated becomes too much, or too hard. (and they shouldn’t have to want to.) This is not a choice for them. They are feared just for existing. You will never, ever know that feeling.
So, while I go to sleep scared for my father’s life, I rest assured knowing that this is what he chooses to do, and wants to do. I truly believe if he died in the line of duty, he would go honorably, and proudly.
Black Lives Matter. This is not a race war- this is a right vs wrong war.
I have noticed my “this is not a racewar” comment sounds a little tonedeaf. I think it’s coming across in a way I didn’t mean.. POC are ABSOLUTELY targeted because of their race, I wasn’t trying to downplay that. I guess I just was trying to explain to white people that people of color don’t hate you because you’re white. They hate they way they are treated. I’m sorry for how that originally sounded. Oye!!”
Written by Ashton Blaine
The black community lives in fear and that is something I never knew. Whether people agree on whether this fear is valid is irrelevant. When someone feels a certain way, its about seeking to understand even if you never will fully. Seek to understand with an open heart and an open mind. We are all raised with different backgrounds, experiences, and cultural differences. This is what makes humanity beautiful. The human connection and being in communion with each other is what Christ has called us to do. I may never understand fully, but I will seek to understand.
Mama’s…we are being called. I spoke my heart the best I could on THIS INSTAGRAM POST this past week. When it comes to topics I feel uneducated about, I naturally want to be quiet and allow others to speak but as a Mama of two I felt it was important to speak my heart. Jeremiah 1:5 tells us “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations”. I believe with my whole heart that we are all born inherently good. We are born with the purest of hearts.
Unfortunately, evil through people, places and events can grab hold of that goodness and make it sour. Our babies aren’t born racists. They do not see color, they see a PERSON.
Mamas, we are being called to educate ourselves & truly LEARN. We must educate our children to LOVE & BE LOVE no matter the color of a persons skin, their gender or background. If we want to change the world, it must start in our homes. One uncomfortable conversation at a time. To my Black Mamas & Mamas of black babies, I am so incredibly sorry. I am so sorry I never truly saw the weight that you all bear. A weight that has been there for generations screaming to be heard. I have gotten a small glimpse into that weight this past week. A fear of the future for my own girls. I know I will never understand fully, but I will stand with you.
God has called us to be the light. I stand firm in His promises of tomorrow and I stand with all of you that are hurting.
With all my heart I promise to raise my babies with the utmost integrity and passion for people. I always knew my girls were world changers but how ironic is it that they are living in the times that we are now? The Corona Virus and the Black Lives Matter movement have changed our nation. How will these events impact our children? I can only pray that God uses them to do His best work.
I am going to be linking some resources that I have found and that were also provided to me by my agency, Shine Influencers.